I Don’t Hate Haircuts; I Hate Getting My Hair Cut
- The Productivity, Travis entry posted on November 17th, 2008.
I have a recurring event in iCal called “Get a haircut you stupid fuck!” Every month it reminds me to stop working, get in the car, head down to the salon and sit there for an hour so that I might look half-way presentable again.
The problem is, I rarely make it on time. I’m a chronic procrastinator as it is and haircuts are no different. I usually miss the schedule by at least a week. This isn’t really because I can’t stand the essence of haircuttery or because I don’t have respect for the fine art of trimming people’s mops. Nope. In fact, more power to them, damnit.
No, my problem is with time allocation. I feel like I can’t possibly afford to sit in one place with no access to anything for such a huge block of time. For the amount of tasks being accomplished, I might as well be asleep. This seriously bothers me. It’s a waste of time according to my brain and you would think my it would have more respect for my hair, being in such close proximity.
It wouldn’t be such a brutal standoff if not for the fact that my stylist loves to chat. While I can understand the need to not have a creeping awkward silence stretching the entire session, it does contribute to the lack of productivity. Primarily because she seems to stop actually cutting my hair when she reaches a climactic point in the story she’s telling — which is about every 10 minutes.
To me, this is unacceptable. Either because of my mild OCD or because it makes sense. In either case, it contributes to the usual state of my hair — out of control.
After hours of research and thinking on the subject — mostly thinking to myself while she was talking — I have come to the conclusion that there are only two possible options.
One. Let’s install some flat screens and wireless keyboards instead of some shitty pointless mirrors in front of the chairs. What’s wrong with that? We’re busy people and we have things to look up, YouTube videos to watch, Tweets to Twitter. This seems like a homerun of a business plan if you ask me. Someone should get on this immediately.
Two. Create a race of self-aware autonomous haircut robots with a comb for one hand and a Flowbee® for the other.
17 Responses to “I Don’t Hate Haircuts; I Hate Getting My Hair Cut”rss
Philip Dhingra, on November 17th, 2008, said:
I’ve had the same problem. What ends up happening is I let my hair grow really long due to procrastination, and then when I’m having an off/boring/do-chores day, I swing around to getting the haircut.
I think it would be easier if I lived right near my stylist, or the salon was right next to places I frequent, so I wouldn’t have to think of the time sink and it’d become more of an “on-the-way” thing rather than a appointment.
But one thing, and this is may or may not apply to you, but I’ve developed a good friendship with my stylist and so the time is also used partially as therapy. I’ve gotten good advice, and I think I’ve given her some insight into how guys approach things. And I wonder if this isn’t a commonly known, but unspoken, “service” that’s included with getting salon cuts. Some (wealthier) women go to their stylist simply because they need advice, not a weekly trim.
Jeremy, on November 17th, 2008, said:
It sounds like it might be time to change stylists, or maybe even switch to a barber as men tend to not be as communicative as women.
Another option of course is the DIY haircut, pick yourself up a pair of clippers and give your melon a once over with a #2
I don’t really mind getting mine cut, I mind that it never looks the way I want it to for a week or two afterward, regardless of who cuts it or how it gets cut.
Jon Williams, on November 19th, 2008, said:
The images remind me of those paper cut out things in magazines(probably 90’s) that you could stick different hair styles onto. Cheers.
Jays, on November 20th, 2008, said:
I am the opposite. I love getting my haircut, but I hate the process of going and waiting for it. I think the waiting around seems silly. And the price people pay for cuts is also silly.
Red, on November 25th, 2008, said:
Supercuts is good for just going in, get your haircut and leave. Usually there isn’t a wait and I can usually get someone that will at least cut it even and short. So it lasts, but still grow out even.
And besides telling the woman to shut-up, I have to spend the 10 minutes saying, yup, nope, yup. uh-uh
Matt Helphrey, on December 16th, 2008, said:
Just tell her to shutup…please. Okay maybe not the best idea, but I believe they are taught to small talk like its going to get them more of a tip. Maybe just suggest that they get some tvs.
Dave, on December 19th, 2008, said:
This is exactly why I never go to public places to get my haircut, my barber lives across the street from me and all I need to do is give him a call and he’s chopping my mop while I get to smoke a cig n drink a beer.
drivelocity, on December 19th, 2008, said:
I go to an old times style barber shop and the guys there talk a bunch of $#!* to each other & all live in the neighborhood, and I’ve gone there for years, so I can’t really see going any place else. My wife has tried. But, the thing that annoys me is that they’re closed Sundays and Mondays, so if I miss going on a Saturday, I need to wait until Tuesday, and then end up waiting until the next Saturday & so on… which reminds me, I need a haircut!
Genel kultur, on January 8th, 2009, said:
i completely agree with you. So this is why i cut my own hair. :)
Goran Website, on January 15th, 2009, said:
I used to get a rash on my trim lines, so I stopped cutting my hair and started growing an afro. I now twist or plait my hair. Works out less painful, Lol!
The Blogger Source, on January 24th, 2009, said:
I hate the finished product. The act of doesn’t so much bother me. Never quite the same way twice.
Rick, on February 7th, 2009, said:
I’ve been cutting my own hair for 10 years… it’s great - takes me 30 mins and I’m done. The only drawback is the cleanup of hair off the bathroom floor!
LittleMiss, on February 13th, 2009, said:
haha, all this stuff is pretty funny to read. i am a recently graduated hairstylist… they do teach us to talk to people… but most of us are just outgoing and talkative as it is. i’m really shy at first so i don’t really talk but if you bring up a conversation i will start to tell you as much as i know on the subject to avoid awkward silences… plus some of us like to get to know the people we are servicing, as opposed to supercuts who could care less because they are getting paid minimum wage/ hourly no matter if they do a good job or not, while in a salon your pay comes from commission and tips, so we are trying to get you to come back to us. tvs wouldn’t be a bad idea, but you still need mirrors so that you as the client can see if we’re jackin you up lol… and it helps us see the front when we are behind you to give you the even cut you want and to make sure that your haircut is lookin good with your head/face shape… i dunno, they told us men are the easiest clients because they aren’t picky and they’ll let you do whatever. but im realizing that may not be true because you guys are all on here bitching about it… its cute.
elaine, on February 17th, 2009, said:
Cut it yur self. It will be better that way. I people that cut there own hair and it look cool on them. The other way is have a frind cut your hair.
Tvents, on June 23rd, 2009, said:
I ever cut my hair by myself. I did it after I washed my hair. I just want to make my hair nice to see. Usually it takes time for me to take care of my hair.
mark, on June 29th, 2009, said:
just read a magazine or catch p on your email. works for me
Flint, on July 1st, 2009, said:
I try to cut my own hair as Genel also said, but it can be quite hard. It also doesn’t seem to turn out too well. Still it is much better than getting my hair cut at a public place.
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